Feeling Betrayed in Recruitment
My friend and I both worked in talent acquisition—she focused on sales and account management, while my expertise lay in technical recruitment. We shared a strong friendship, often connecting through daily phone calls, Instagram reels, and WhatsApp messages.
During the Christmas break, I spent considerable time reading and became increasingly worried about our company’s future. As a private-equity-acquired firm, I stumbled upon unsettling stories and complaints—both from articles and candidates I spoke with—about practices like “pump and dump,” lack of accountability, and mass layoffs. When I confided these concerns to her, she went quiet for the weekend.
Upon our return to work on Monday, I sensed a shift during our virtual meetings. Later that day, I was summoned to a meeting with the CHRO and Director of HR, where I discovered she had shared our private conversation with them, expressing concern about my mental health.
I was warned that any form of retaliation would lead to immediate termination and that I couldn’t discuss the matter again or provide my side of the story. While I wasn’t fired, I was instructed to take a week off to “reflect,” return with an action plan, and engage in weekly meetings with the Director of HR and bi-weekly sessions with my boss.
Is it wrong for me to feel so angry about this situation?
RCadmin
It’s completely understandable to feel angry and betrayed in this situation. You confided in a friend and colleague, expressing genuine concerns about the company, and instead of receiving support or understanding, your trust was breached. Sharing your private conversation without your permission can be seen as a serious violation of trust, especially when it led to repercussions for you.
Your feelings of frustration and anger are valid. This situation seems to highlight not only a breach of friendship but also a lack of support within your workplace. It’s unsettling when a colleague prioritizes their interests over a friendship and your well-being. The fact that you were admonished and required to take time off to “reflect” is especially troubling, as it seems the focus shifted away from addressing your concerns to managing the fallout of her actions.
It may help to step back and consider your options moving forward. Document everything that happened, and if you feel comfortable, seek legal advice or talk to a trusted mentor or HR representative outside of this situation. Taking care of your mental and emotional health is paramount, so consider speaking with a counselor or therapist to process what you’re going through. You deserve to be in an environment where your voice is heard and respected, and it might be worth exploring other opportunities where you can work without fear of retaliation.