The Perils of Professional Etiquette: A Cautionary Tale from the Recruiting Trenches

In the realm of recruiting, one frequently encounters a variety of personalities—some welcoming and others, less so. Today, I’d like to share an experience that has stuck with me over the years, illustrating the importance of professionalism in our interactions.

A few years ago, I temporarily took on a tech hiring role, primarily focusing on sales and business positions. I was keen on connecting with candidates that align with our company culture and values. During this period, I found an open role and began sourcing potential candidates, leveraging contacts from companies known for offering competitive salaries and benefits.

I reached out to an applicant whose profile indicated he was actively seeking new opportunities, highlighting the job’s salary and job description in my initial message. My approach was straightforward—just a brief note suggesting a possible fit and an invitation for a conversation.

The candidate replied the next day with a curt request for the salary—an understandable reaction, though somewhat dismissive of my prior message. After sharing the figure, he responded with an elaborate rebuttal filled with condescension, claiming he earned four times that amount and ridiculing our compensation package as “laughable.”

He dismissed the position as beneath him, critiqued the job description, and deemed the tasks unworthy of his skills, which were unrelated to the role in question. To add insult to injury, he hurled personal insults my way, generalizing all recruiters as incompetent, and shockingly concluded by telling me to “go kill myself.”

Fast forward a few years, I find myself in a larger company, a Fortune 100 firm, and once again handling tech roles. Imagine my surprise when I came across his name on a recent application! I confirmed it was indeed the same individual, who had remained at his previous firm until late last year. His follow-up on LinkedIn revealed he had been laid off—a twist of fate that, while unfortunate, made me ponder the earlier exchange.

Despite his prior rude behavior, I acknowledged that he was qualified for the roles we had available. However, I couldn’t ignore the stark contrast between his claimed earnings and the competitive compensation we offered, which could be nearly double what he previously claimed.

With four other candidates equally suited for the position—without the baggage of unpleasant exchanges—I decided that his attitude rendered him unsuitable for our team dynamic.

As I prepare to send out the rejection email, I find myself reflecting